


In My Arms

by silveryink



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Thor (Movies)
Genre: First shapeshift, Happy Ending, Loki (Marvel) is a Good Parent, Multi, Pre-Thor (2011), Shapeshifting, Sorry Not Sorry, but i made it angsty, little bit of angst with a happy ending, the snake story
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-13
Updated: 2018-10-13
Packaged: 2019-08-01 13:31:47
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,651
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16285508
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/silveryink/pseuds/silveryink
Summary: Vali shapeshifts for the first time. Loki and Sigyn are not at home to help him through it, but Narvi is.





	In My Arms

**Author's Note:**

> I sometimes wonder at how I can see something meant to be funny and make it angsty. Anyway... I was trying something out with the concept of shapeshifters. What if their first change was more disorienting, because they wouldn't really know what t do? Most of the time their family would be there to help them through but on the rare occasion that they aren't, well, the kid would be severely confused and maybe even in pain from the change.  
> Aaaaand this was the result.

“Be good to Thor, okay? He isn’t used to the way we deal with things in our family.” Loki bent down to kiss his twin sons. Vali and Narvi hugged him. “We will be at our best behaviour, Father,” Narvi assured him.

Sigyn smiled fondly at them. “I’m sure.”

Loki took her hand and led her courteously out of the front door. He turned at the last minute to say farewell to his sons. “Thor will be here in a bit, he will see to it that you have everything you need. If there is anything important that concerns either of us-”

“We will call,” Vali promised, and Narvi nodded eagerly.

Loki chuckled and shut the door behind them.

* * *

 

Narvi reached for the book, leaning against the shelf lightly and standing on his toes. His father must have forgotten to place it back on the lower shelves. It was a pity Uncle Thor wasn’t here, otherwise he could have asked him to get the book down.

As it was, he reached for the tome, straining slightly-

A loud scream nearly made him lose his balance. He stumbled backwards, recognising his brother’s shout despite it becoming an animalistic growl. He sprinted as fast as he could to their chambers. He could guess what had happened – Vali must have shifted for the first time.

Narvi himself had shifted a year or so ago for the first time. He’d been in Loki’s study, while his father was tutoring him in Aesir history, and he’d suddenly shifted into a tiny owl. In his confusion, he’d fluttered around Loki’s head for a minute or so before settling on his hair.

Loki had simply talked to him in a low voice to calm him down before he encouraged Narvi to hop down onto his palm so that he could spark his _seidr_ to shift back.

 _“It gets easy after the first few times,”_ Loki had said. _“The first time can be especially frightening and painful if not taken care of. Then, your_ seidr _simply gets used to the change to the point where it needs it.”_

Narvi entered the room quietly, but not in total silence. Vali was curled in on himself, a small wolf cub huddled on the carpet. “Vali,” he called. “It’s Narvi. Your brother.”

He stepped forward and extended his hand to Vali’s snout but let it hover in front of it without actually touching the glossy fur. Vali went cross-eyed for a minute, trying to look at it, and Narvi thought his brother looked practically _adorable,_ but bit back a smile.

Vali inched forward and nudged his hand hesitantly. Narvi gently stroked the small snout, speaking in soft tones about what Loki had taught him concerning shifting, before he shifted to other topics. Vali listened intently and was significantly calmer by the time Narvi paused to take a breath.

Just then, however, the front door banged loudly and they heard voices from below. Vali growled in agitation and lashed out. Narvi winced when he felt sharp claws rake across his face but didn’t show any outward sign of pain, choosing instead to keep his expression calm.

“Vali, it’s okay,” he said, and sang an old lullaby Loki would sing to them when they were young (and sometimes even now, for they loved to hear their father sing as he rarely ever did) during rough nights. His low, rich voice would soothe their nightmares away, and Narvi often caught Sigyn standing at the doorway, listening to her husband silently with a blissful expression on her face.

By the time the footsteps reached them, Vali was calm once more. Narvi’s face was turned to the door, so while they couldn’t see the scars, they _could_ see the wolf-cub. Narvi was suddenly seized by fear for his brother as he felt Mjolnir’s power hum nearby. He also felt the familiar sensation of his parents’ _seidr_ and knew that they would understand.

Loki stepped forward and knelt before Vali and Narvi. “Vali, I need to spark your _seidr_ to help you change back,” he started to explain, but Vali moved backwards.

“Father can help you, I promise,” Narvi told his brother.

Vali hesitated before allowing his father to approach him. Loki spent a minute cooing over how cute his son looked as a wolf cub to get Vali into good spirits before he raised his hand slowly, wreathing it in green-gold _seidr_ , and rested it on Vali’s head.

Vali changed back slowly with a yelp of surprise. His soft fur melted away to become skin once more, and once Vali had fully returned to his usual form, he grabbed onto Loki’s tunic and started to sob into his chest.

“Child, you’re okay, you’re fine, I know it was scary, but you dealt it so well…”

Sigyn knelt down beside them and rested a hand against her son’s back. Narvi stepped back, knowing that his brother would need their parents’ comfort and reassurances. “My brave boy,” Sigyn whispered.

Vali mumbled something in between sobs that none of them could understand. Well, Narvi could guess, and, apparently, so could Sigyn. She looked up at Narvi, who did his best not to meet her gaze, and seemed to put it together. “What was that you said, darling?” she asked Vali.

“I’m – sorry!” he exclaimed, and gasped. “It was my – I didn’t  - I never meant to hurt him, I’m sorry, Mother…” Vali sobbed even harder. Loki hushed him softly and pulled him close, rubbing circles into his back.

“Narvi?” Sigyn asked.

He looked up then, showing them the scratches on his face. Loki and Sigyn looked concerned but not horrified like Narvi had thought they would be. Vali, who had looked up just then, whimpered in dismay. “I’m sorry,” he said once more.

Narvi dropped to his knees next to his brother. The two of them rarely fought over anything seriously, and even when they did, they usually sorted it out with verbal arguments and not with their fists (this, while being Loki and Sigyn’s first rule in their house, was also a promise of their own to each other). Neither of the twins had never had cause to shed the other’s blood before, nor had they done so on the training grounds.

He rested a hand on Vali’s shoulder. He could feel him trembling like a leaf. “It wasn’t your fault,” he said firmly. “You were disoriented by the change.”

Vali started to speak up, but Narvi cut him off with a hug. Their parents watched them for a minute, before Loki spoke up. “I actually – my first shift was a lot like this,” he said.

“Was it really?” Vali asked carefully.

Loki nodded. “As you know, neither the All-father nor the All-mother can change form, and Thor cannot do so as well. So I had no one who could help me with my first shift. They did not know what to expect.

“The first time I shifted, I became a little garden snake. Thor tells me I was green with golden markings-”

“Like your _seidr_.”

“Exactly.” Loki ruffled his son’s hair fondly. “I was confused and Thor found me in the gardens where someone had seen fit to leave me. He was quite fond of snakes, so he picked me up. I somehow managed to shift back and… attacked him.”

“You stabbed me and yelled, ‘Mblerhg, it’s me!’” Thor said dryly.

Vali giggled. Loki’s face turned red at the comment, and Sigyn laughed and kissed him on the cheek. A small smile danced across his lips then.

“So you are not angry?”

“No, Vali,” Sigyn said. “We are worried, is all.”

“Narvi?” There was no mistaking Vali’s pleading tone.

“I’m not angry,” he assured his twin. “You forget, I have shifted before. I knew how to help you, and I am glad you trusted me to do so.”

Sigyn and Loki exchanged a proud look. Loki seemed to remember Thor and stood up after disentangling Vali from him carefully. “If you’ll excuse me,” he said, “I have to talk to your uncle.”

* * *

 

Loki pushed open the door to his study. “Get in,” he said shortly.

Thor winced at the tone. “Brother, I-”

“ _Get. In._ ”

Thor knew the deadly calm in Loki’s voice that hid his fury, which was rivaled only by Thor’s own temper. While Thor spent his anger quickly by pounding the offender to the ground, Loki had other methods of making someone regret their choices. He decided that it was in his best interests to listen. Loki entered the room after him and shut the door calmly.

Thor waited as Loki turned to face him. “ _What_ were you thinking?”

“Loki-”

“I _specifically_ told you not to leave them alone.”

“I know-”

‘This is _exactly_ what I was afraid of, Thor. Do you know how painful, how disorienting a person’s first shift can be?”

“I-”

“No, you don’t. But I do. Which is why I took the precaution of ensuring that you would watch over them. By the Norns, Thor, what can _possibly_ be your excuse for neglecting them like this?”

“I did not know, Loki, I thought you meant me to stay and watch over them so that they could not get into any trouble.”

Loki closed his eyes and breathed through his nose, clenching and unclenching his fists. It was no good to yell at Thor, despite how much he wanted to. When he was certain his response would be cool and collected instead of a punch to his face, he spoke up. “That was the _least_ of my concerns. Vali and Narvi can behave themselves.”

“I-”

“You said that you didn’t know how painful a first change could be. I can tell you firsthand that it can be agonising if one’s conditions are not ideal.”

“You stabbed me when you shifted back,” Thor said.

“I was terrified, Thor,” Loki snapped. His voice was rising, but he couldn’t bring himself to care. “I was just minding my own business and walking in the gardens, then I find myself in a form I barely know and at the time wasn’t mine, with no idea how I did so. Then you picked me up – no, I don’t blame you – and I panicked. All I could think was that you were a threat. I still have no idea how I shifted back, but the second change left me even _more_ confused than I already was.”

“I’m sorry,” Thor mumbled.

Loki shrugged half-heartedly. Thor had gone running to his parents, and while Frigga had understood what had happened, Odin had punished him for attacking Thor, even when Loki had explained the entire thing to him. He’d never blamed Thor, though, as the thunderer had no idea about a shifter’s first change.

“I didn’t want to see my son in pain, Thor,” Loki said. “I didn’t think that it would be too much to ask for.”

Thor flinched.

“He could have _died_ ,” Loki continued. “Vali could have died or gone insane from agony. It is only thanks to Narvi that he-” he broke off abruptly. His head was spinning, and he suddenly thought of everything that could have gone wrong. “Get out,” he told Thor, not wanting to break down in front of him. “We can continue this later.”

“Brother-”

“ _LEAVE!_ ” Loki roared. “I thought I could trust that you would look after the twins – I wasn’t afraid that they would get into trouble, I was afraid that Vali might feel the pain that I felt all those years ago. I wanted to _protect_ him from it, though I-” _though I failed._ He broke off once more, suppressing a shudder.

“Leave,” he repeated hoarsely. “We’re not done yet, but I don’t want to deal with this now.”

Thor nodded and left, subdued. The minute he heard the door close, Loki staggered over to one of the couches and sank down into it, letting his posture sag. He drew a shaky breath that turned into a hitching sob as the worry he’d tried to bury earlier surfaced once more.

A minute or so later, he felt a hand on his shoulder and looked up through blurred vision to see Vali looking concernedly at him. Then, his son climbed onto his lap and wrapped his arms around him. Loki stilled, taken aback by the display of affection.

“Move over, Vali,” said Narvi’s soft voice from somewhere to his side, and Vali obliged, shifting so that he was on Loki’s left leg and Narvi could sit on his right.

“Think there’s room for me?” Sigyn asked dryly from the doorway.

“Darling, there’s always room for you,” Loki replied cheekily. Sigyn smirked and sat next to him, maneuvering herself in such a way that she was curled around her husband and children. She kissed him on the temple and could feel him relax slowly. He exhaled slowly and hugged them back, letting the tears flow freely as they had a minute ago.

He’d always felt secure with his family, and they knew to give him time to come to terms with what happened – that he needed to let all his fear out, so they were silent in their comfort, at least until he pulled away enough to dry his eyes with his sleeve.

“I’m fine, Father,” Vali said calmly. “I’m fine, and Narvi’s fine – Mother healed him just after you left, but the scars won’t fade, and Narvi says he likes them because-”

“I like them because they are _your_ marks on me,” Narvi finished. “I think I see them as your way of… claiming me.”

Loki smiled fondly at them. One of the countless things he loved about his sons was how unconditionally they loved and believed in each other.

“-and we heard you shouting, which was odd because you barely raise your voice, but when we heard what you were saying, and saw Uncle Thor leaving, we came to talk to you.”

“We were not sure whether to approach you, at first,” Sigyn said softly. “You were quite far gone in your despair.”

“I doubt that it was that dramatic,” Loki said with a frown.

“Oh, it was,” Sigyn said flatly. “Then Vali thought it would be best to.”

Vali cocked his head to the side thoughtfully. “Why are you upset?” he asked bluntly.

Narvi bit back a sigh at his brother’s straightforwardness. Loki had always encouraged it (said he found it refreshing after all the honeyed words from the Council), though, so he just smiled shakily. “I’m not upset,” he said.

His sons shot him unimpressed looks. Loki blinked, taken aback by how _familiar_ the look was, before shaking his head. “Not like that,” he elaborated. “I am – I was worried about the two of you. That you might let this drive you apart, and about how the shift could have gone wrong, how-” he stopped yet again, feeling his throat close up with emotion. Sigyn stroked her husband’s hair comfortingly, knowing exactly what he meant.

Vali rested his head against Loki’s shoulder. “But we’re fine,” he said. “Nothing happened.”

“I know, my little cub,” Loki said, “but when I saw you in that form, all I could think of was myself as a child. And I remembered the pain from that… well, let us call it an incident. And I was worried that the worst could happen. When I learnt more about my _seidr_ and shifting abilities, I also read about how it might have gone wrong, and I think my thoughts ran away with me.”

“And are they back?”

Loki laughed, wondering for a moment how he was so lucky. “Yes, Vali. They are back.”

Vali hummed happily and nestled himself in his father’s arms. Minutes later, he and Narvi drifted off to sleep. Loki and Sigyn watched their children in contented silence. The couple too slipped into a peaceful slumber, Loki simply content to be in his family’s arms.

**Author's Note:**

> I can be found on tumblr as _silveryinkystar_ , in case anyone wants to chat about marvel  
> Also, Loki does have a chat with Thor later, I just wanted to write him happily dozing off with his family because that is honestly a sweet image  
> Also you can't convince me that Loki wouldn't sing to his kids. Not to anyone else, maybe, but he wouldn't say no to the twins.


End file.
